Yep, you read the title correctly! Last night I enjoyed a glass of champagne and toasted to never breast-feeding again!
Last week I came to the realisation that it’s ok to stop breast-feeding! It’s ok to bottle feed, in fact if that makes you and baby happy then that’s what you should do. Evie is 5 weeks now and over that 5 weeks I have breast-fed the whole time. Also in that time I have cried a lot, been in pain a lot, felt under terrible pressure and felt a failure as a mum. It’s not been a positive experience for me.
When I was pregnant with Louie my first-born I tried to breast-feed but after a difficult labour and experiencing infections in my wounds I had issues with him latching on properly. I ended up stopping after only a couple of weeks, I felt terrible but Louie just wasn’t getting the amount of milk he needed. I remember having to justify myself to the health visitor, midwives and other mums at various classes as to why I wasn’t breast-feeding anymore. I could see the looks of disapproval and I felt horrid. So this time when I was pregnant with Evie I really wanted to successfully feed. I mean at all these antenatal classes they make it sound so easy, it’s a natural thing and any idiot can do it, it’s the best thing for your child and that is what you should do!!
After having a nice natural labour with Evie I thought right this is my chance to be a proper mum and breast feed like all good mums do. Well hats off to all of you good mums cos its bloody hard! They fail to mention how bloody hard it is at all these antenatal classes and midwife appointments. I have cried so many times I have lost count, I have been in hideous pain and suffered with 2 nasty bouts of mastitis. I have felt isolated and alone, it really hasn’t been the experience I thought it would be. I have many friends that have breast-fed and have nothing but positive things to say about it and I love that. I think that if its right for you and you enjoy it then you should make the most of it. I also have friends that have had a shit experience and have felt like they are the worst mums in the world because they have had to stop for various reasons.
I now refuse to feel guilty for making a decision that is best for my family. My baby is well fed and is happy and mummy is now too! So I say cheers to whatever decision you make for feeding your baby, formula or breast because I can certainly say that breast is not always best.